Men v Women - words with two meanings.
Posted: 28 June 2007 03:21 PM   [ Ignore ]  
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1. THINGY (thing-ee) n.

Female...... Any part under a car’s hood.

Male..... The strap fastener on a woman’s bra.

2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.

Female.... Fully opening up one’s self emotionally to another.

Male.... Playing cricket without a box.

3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.

Female… The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one’s partner.

Male… Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.

4. COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.

Female.... A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male...... Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.

5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.

Female.... A good movie, concert, play or book.

Male...... Anything that can be done while drinking beer.

6. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.

Female.... An embarrassing by product of indigestion.

Male...... A source of entertainment, self-expression, male bonding.

7 MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.

Female...... The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.

Male.. Call it whatever you want, just as long as we do it.

8. REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.

Female.... A device for changing from one TV channel to another.

Male… A device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.

AND;

He said . . . I don’t know why you wear a bra; you’ve got nothing to put in it.

She said . . . You wear pants don’t you?

He said . . ...Shall we try swapping positions tonight?

She said . That’s a good idea - you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart!

He said . ... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?

She said . .....Turn sideways and look in the mirror!

He said . . ...Why don’t you tell me when you have an orgasm?

She said . . .. I would but you’re never there.

He said . ..... Why don’t women blink during foreplay?

She said . . They don’t have time

He said . . How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?

She said . . We don’t know; it has never happened.

He said . . Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive,caring and Good- looking?

She said ...... . . They already have boyfriends.

She said...What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?

He said . . . A widow.

He said . .. . Why are married women heavier than single women?

She said . . . Single women come home, see what’s in the fridge and go to bed.

Married women come home, see what’s in bed and go to the fridge.

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Posted: 08 July 2007 01:03 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 1 ]  
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man men are getting railed we need some good jokes about how bad they are. lol ouch guys got a serious case of third degree burns on this post.

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